How Much Should You Schedule Your Kids - How to Know When Enough Is Enough With Extracurricular Activities
NOVEMBER 19TH, 2024
Should kids have more time to play? You may ponder that while driving your child to gymnastics for the third time this week. If so, you're not the only one.
Research shows that today's children have less free time than ever¹ between homework and activities ranging from organized sports to arts and crafts, music, social clubs, and STEM-related activities. One recent study revealed that kids spend only seven² hours a week playing.
Based on these outcomes, experts have warned² parents that kids need more freedom and autonomy. They say extracurricular activities can be enriching, but too many can lead to burnout.
So, how do you know whether your child's schedule is too full? We show you the benefits of extracurricular activities and how to spot signs of overscheduling. We also give tips on creating more balance so you can empower her to explore her world in her own time.
Research shows that today's children have less free time than ever¹ between homework and activities ranging from organized sports to arts and crafts, music, social clubs, and STEM-related activities. One recent study revealed that kids spend only seven² hours a week playing.
Based on these outcomes, experts have warned² parents that kids need more freedom and autonomy. They say extracurricular activities can be enriching, but too many can lead to burnout.
So, how do you know whether your child's schedule is too full? We show you the benefits of extracurricular activities and how to spot signs of overscheduling. We also give tips on creating more balance so you can empower her to explore her world in her own time.
Why Do Parents Overschedule?
Compared to around 30 years ago, kids have less¹ unstructured time. According to a global survey, 70%² of caregivers choose achievement-based activities over playtime for their kids, meaning kids spend just 4%² of their week playing, with 32%² only getting three hours of play weekly.
This societal change is due to many factors¹ when we consider high-profile kidnapping cases in the eighties, followed by a stranger danger narrative, a shift in parenting styles, and increasing pressure³ on parents to enroll kids into extracurricular activities.
Dr. Harpreet Kaur⁴ - licensed clinical psychologist for kids and teens at the Children’s Hospital of Orange County, explains³, "I think parents feel this pressure to prepare their kids for academic success and make them competitive college applicants and make them successful for a job, but they often miss out on that unstructured playtime that provides some of the skills that kids need to be successful anyway."
However, whether your child has one or more activities on the go, some things kids don't learn in school, and extracurriculars fill that gap.
This societal change is due to many factors¹ when we consider high-profile kidnapping cases in the eighties, followed by a stranger danger narrative, a shift in parenting styles, and increasing pressure³ on parents to enroll kids into extracurricular activities.
Dr. Harpreet Kaur⁴ - licensed clinical psychologist for kids and teens at the Children’s Hospital of Orange County, explains³, "I think parents feel this pressure to prepare their kids for academic success and make them competitive college applicants and make them successful for a job, but they often miss out on that unstructured playtime that provides some of the skills that kids need to be successful anyway."
However, whether your child has one or more activities on the go, some things kids don't learn in school, and extracurriculars fill that gap.
Extra Curricular Activities: What Are the Benefits?
After school activities are an excellent opportunity for kids to develop their social skills by interacting with other kids besides classmates.
Children can develop different skills, like time management³, perseverance, and responsibility, depending on their activity.
Speech-language pathologist and former schoolteacher Rachel Cortese⁵ says⁶, "Kids tend to do really well when they have structure, and part of that structure is having an afterschool schedule."
Whether your child is into soccer or a wanna-be Sydney McLaughlin-Levrone (American hurdler and sprinter), regular physical activity promotes a healthy lifestyle and helps build body confidence.
Chess stimulates your child's brain by fostering creativity⁷, as do as music⁸ lessons and coding⁹. Running a (self-directed) Kid Business can boost creativity, financial literacy, and leadership skills.
From music to art to sports, mastering a new skill can boost her sense of accomplishment and self-esteem⁶. No matter which activities you pick, there are plenty of well-being benefits for your daughter, but is there such a thing as spreading yourself too thin?
Children can develop different skills, like time management³, perseverance, and responsibility, depending on their activity.
Speech-language pathologist and former schoolteacher Rachel Cortese⁵ says⁶, "Kids tend to do really well when they have structure, and part of that structure is having an afterschool schedule."
Whether your child is into soccer or a wanna-be Sydney McLaughlin-Levrone (American hurdler and sprinter), regular physical activity promotes a healthy lifestyle and helps build body confidence.
Chess stimulates your child's brain by fostering creativity⁷, as do as music⁸ lessons and coding⁹. Running a (self-directed) Kid Business can boost creativity, financial literacy, and leadership skills.
From music to art to sports, mastering a new skill can boost her sense of accomplishment and self-esteem⁶. No matter which activities you pick, there are plenty of well-being benefits for your daughter, but is there such a thing as spreading yourself too thin?
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When Is Too Much Too Much?
When kids are overscheduled at the expense of free time to play, it can lead³ to irritability, tiredness, stress, anxiety, and even depression.
Kaur notes³ rates of anxiety and depression are already pretty high among adolescents, and "overscheduling kids just makes those rates increase."
So, it might be time to take stock if your child is frequently irritable, complains about being tired and busy, expresses dread at going to certain activities, or perhaps withdraws from friends and family.
Kaur notes³ rates of anxiety and depression are already pretty high among adolescents, and "overscheduling kids just makes those rates increase."
So, it might be time to take stock if your child is frequently irritable, complains about being tired and busy, expresses dread at going to certain activities, or perhaps withdraws from friends and family.
Find the Perfect Balance
An excellent way to figure out if your child has enough downtime is by asking yourself these questions:
- Is my child getting enough (8-10 hours) sleep?
- Can she do her homework?
- Can she hang out with friends and family?
- Is there enough time to eat as a family?
Child Psychiatrist Dr. Colman Noctor¹⁰ suggests¹¹ three activities in one week are enough to give your child a healthy balance. However, this depends on whether the focus is on fun or performance, as 'too many performance-focused activities run the risk of burnout.'¹¹
He adds that if your child wants to do ten activities, it's time to step in and prune her least favorite ones. Also, most sports are seasonal, so mix things up during the year and expose her to different sports or enroll her in summer camps to experience other activities.
Most experts stress⁶ that every child is different, and some kids thrive on being highly scheduled. Other kids do well at self-directed activities, where they get a block of time to work on a cherished hobby. For instance, if your child is determined to run a kid business and you fear tutoring involves too many time commitments, why not block time slots where she can work on jewelry design or something similar? This strategy allows her to be creative, think for herself, and have free reign over her time.
He adds that if your child wants to do ten activities, it's time to step in and prune her least favorite ones. Also, most sports are seasonal, so mix things up during the year and expose her to different sports or enroll her in summer camps to experience other activities.
Most experts stress⁶ that every child is different, and some kids thrive on being highly scheduled. Other kids do well at self-directed activities, where they get a block of time to work on a cherished hobby. For instance, if your child is determined to run a kid business and you fear tutoring involves too many time commitments, why not block time slots where she can work on jewelry design or something similar? This strategy allows her to be creative, think for herself, and have free reign over her time.
Here are some more tips to consider when implementing a good balance:
- Check in with your daughter if she enjoys her activities (do this regularly)
- Start with a few activities and build slowly: do trial periods before committing.
- Focus on quality over quantity: if she only has one activity she loves, maybe stick to that one.
- Ensure she has enough downtime for mental health and creativity.
- Allocate specific days for rest (doing nothing) and family time.
- Find activities close to home to cut out driving time.
Sources:
- The decline of American playtime — and how to resurrect it | Vox
- The LEGO Group’s Play Is Your Superpower Campaign| Lego
- After-school activities: The pros and cons of filling your kids' schedule - CHOC Children's
- Harpreet Kaur, Psychologist, Tustin, CA, 92780 | Psychology Today
- Rachel Cortese, MS, CCC-SLP - Child Mind Institute
- Finding the Balance With After-School Activities - Child Mind Institute
- 9 Benefits of Playing Chess: Plus Potential Downsides
- The Influence of Music Activities on Children’s Creative Thinking Development
- How coding helps children become creative problem solvers – Scholarcy
- Dr. Colman Noctor - Naas Counselling & Psychotherapy Services | The Basin Street Centre
- Colman Noctor: How much is too much when scheduling children’s activities?